A Few Remarks on Peeta Mellark and Gale Hawthorne (or, Why I’m Team Katniss)

Before we begin, let’s put aside the fact that romance in books or movies isn’t a requirement for me.  Let’s ignore the fact that many a love triangle has overrun otherwise engaging characters in compelling stories, and let’s not comment on the fact that the central triangle in The Hunger Games doesn’t generally display Suzanne Collins’s writing skills to their utmost.  None of these reasons compare to why, in the Team Peeta vs. Team Gale debate, I’m forever Team Katniss.

First things first:  once she realizes how both Peeta and Gale feel about her (and that takes a while, because it’s hard for Katniss to believe that virtually anyone gives any sort of damn about her,) she tells both boys that romance isn’t the cards.  She doesn’t do it especially artfully, but she’s earnest in her assurances that it’s not about anything either of them did.  Although “it’s not you, it’s me” has a reputation for being a cliché, when she says it, she means it.    

The past baggage and present dangers behind that “it’s not you, it’s me” are formidable.  Let’s start with her conviction that she can never get married, because she feels she can never get pregnant, because she’s terrified at the thought of her child being sent into the Arena.  This is the world the characters live in, and that’s a huge, horrifying prospect for a 16-year-old girl to come to grips with.  With fears like that inside her, it’s no wonder she’s not in any sort of headspace to be in a relationship.  Then, of course, there’s the small matter that she’s incredibly busy with super-important stuff throughout the trilogy.  Whether she’s trying to survive a sadistic televised battle to the death, satisfy the Capitol propaganda machine so the president won’t murder everyone she loves, or figure out how to be the symbol of a revolution her actions inadvertently helped inspire, she’s got a lot on her plate.  For much of the series, she’s in straight-up fight-or-flight mode, and she doesn’t have much time to process her feelings for either boy, which are complicated and confusing in both cases.

And really, once she’s said no, there’s nothing else she should have to say.  But she cares about both Gale and Peeta and feels she needs both of them in her life (plus, she’s Katniss, so she’s inclined to assume responsibility for other people’s pain regardless of whether it’s actually her fault.)  So she tells them all of this – that she’s in no place to even begin to think about a life that includes anything like that, and at the moment, she’s working hard enough just trying to keep herself, her family, and her friends alive.  She tells them all this, and while the two boys have different reactions over the course of the story (in Peeta’s defense, he’s often at least slightly more understanding than Gale,) there’s a tendency in both to throw their hurt feelings in her face.

Now boys, I get that Katniss is pretty amazing.  I’m not surprised that either of you is in love with her.  But would it kill you to give her a little space?  Like I said, Peeta, you tend to be a bit better, so you’re further down on my irritation list, but I can’t stand it when you two get huffy or angsty or passive-aggressive about Katniss not dating you.  Because I love her, too – in a fictional-character platonic sort of way – and I see the way she beats herself up over your moodiness.  She has enough massive stress, major responsibility, and misplaced guilt without you mooning over her, and she doesn’t need any more.  You both say you’re your friends, so maybe act like it.  Stop making her feel bad about herself, recognize that she has way too much to deal with right now, and give her the support she (again, your friend) needs without making her feel guilty for not falling into your arms the way that you want.